


爱是伟大的，轮回不是。( love is great, reincarnation is not. )

by sunbabe



Category: Original Work
Genre: Angst, Character Death, Eventual Romance, Fluff, How Do I Tag, M/M, Other, Pining, Reincarnation, Romance, Slow Burn, Smut, Temporary Character Death, cultivation
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-10-28
Updated: 2019-11-01
Packaged: 2021-01-05 22:48:21
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 4,364
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21216317
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sunbabe/pseuds/sunbabe
Summary: lan nainzu and xi huang-jun were young cultivators with a bright future ahead of them. until their paths met a crossroad, and they separated. yet, fifteen years later after xi huang-jun's assumed death, he returns to lan nainzu's life. and the two get thrown into a mess that's nearly impossible to escape.





	1. beginning.

**Author's Note:**

> ** i can't say any of the translations will be exactly accurate, so sorry if they aren't what i intended them to appear as! i will have a guide at the end of every chapter of what the words should be!  
** the chapters will move between current time and flashbacks, i'll have headings for them

lan nainzu stumbled forwards, his lungs burning. the sky was dark, but the rising flames against that black ended that. the male's legs nearly gave out from underneath him, but a pride swelled in his chest. they had won. the war that has raged for over four years had ended. and they had won it. 

but, as he stood there, his victory was short lived. they lost many, the bodies scattering the ground showing this. and the bodies they buried before even more. but, his mind slowly realized something. xi huang-jun...where was he? he began to stumble around, searching for someone who didn't seem to be there anymore. 

" xi huang-jun! a-huang-jun!" 

he called out, lips pressed in a thin line. panic thrummed in his chest. oh god. lan nainzu continued around, calling out but never earning reply. soon enough, an answer made itself clear in the silence. 

and standing some ways away was xiao guang-he. the fierce corpse looked...lost. his tattered robes fluttered in the wind, his hair swaying alonside it. his pale skin making him blend into the night. 

but those bright brown eyes, thriving with blank life. it was both terrifying and oddly comforting. but, the fact that he seemed unaware of what to do, as if he had no one to give him guide. the simple sight caused his worst fear to arise. this means his master was gone. 

_four years earlier. _

" xi huang-jun! " 

a voice shouted out, while the said male ran along with a grin. lan nainzu peered up from scrolls he was tending too, brows furrowed. and quickly, a dark haired male stumbled into the room. lan nainzu set the scroll down onto the table, and xi huang-jun peered over at this sound. 

" oh! lan nainzu? "

he made a face to this, before sighing softly. lan nainzu pushed himself to stand, his robes settled down with this movement. what an annoyance. 

" leave here. this isn't a room to play in. " 

and suddenly, the door slid back open. xiao guang-he was standing there, slumped over and huffing heavily. he blinked when he noticed lan nainzu, standing there with a rather annoyed look painting his expression. 

which nearly scared xiao guang-he half to death. his posture quickly shifted so that he was standing straight up, hands fumbling to find something. 

" lan xuande! ack, i'm so sorry! " 

the male bowed quickly, cheeks flushed red before moving to grab his friend, tugging him from the room. 

" bye lan nainzu~! " 

the door, one last time, slid shut. a sigh past his lips as he settled back to where he was originally sitting, hands resting against the table once again.

" what an annoyance. " 

lan nainzu grumbled as he moved to pick the scrolls back up again, quietly repeating through the words as he previously had been. 

" that was an absolute idiotic move! you could've made lan xuande angry! " 

xiao guang-he hissed quietly. he gently shook the shoulders of his friend, as if this would shake any common sense into his mind. but, of course, it wouldn't. 

" ah come on! loosen up! it was just a bit of fun! "

xi huang-jun huffed in his defense, that bright grin still pulling on his lips while the other continued to shake him gently, swatting at his hands to stop him. 

" we're here to study! not to loosen up! " 

xiao guang-he responded, shaking his friend once again by the shoulders. another huff left his lips as he let out of xi huang-jun, pressing two fingers to his temples. 

xi huang-jun simply laughed at this reaction before tugging the other close, ruffling his hair. the action, of course, was met with resistance. 

" hey! stop it! " 

the way these two acted, one would believe them to be bickering brothers than best friends. and honestly, the two often found themselves thinking the same. 

what a simple time. with childish actions and quiet glares. 


	2. 1.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> **in current time 
> 
> xi huang-jun wakes up in a strange place, to realize he's alive again. so he believes, it's time to figure this out.

everything was dark. and it felt as if xi huang-jun was floating. until, suddenly, the world flashed bright with light. a yelp squawked past the male's lips. 

his head thrummed harshly, and that made the world spin. the bright light nearly burned his vision, earning a groan as he raised his hand to shield his eyes. what was going on? this didn't make any sense. 

especially since he was supposed to be dead. 

as he shifted around, xi huang-jun noticed a water trough. peering down, he examined his appearance. he pulled slightly at his cheeks, surprised at just how similar to how he originally looked. 

long dark hair, taupe eyes and rather darkened skin. his hair, or well, whoever's body he was tossed into, was a mess. dark locks hanging over his face, and occasionally swaying in his eyes. 

propping himself back on his hands, it gave him time to realize he was in a stable. though, avoid of any animals. odd, but he didn't question this as he pushed himself to stand up off the ground. 

patting down his robes, the male wobbled from the stable. he had forgotten what it was like to walk. at first, it was much like toddler attempting their first steps. stumbling around, and using the poles that held the roof up as a support. but after a few minutes, everything returned to him. 

how to walk, speak, run, and all. all those natural instincts he's been deprived of for almost fifteen years. and that's when the thought smacked him straight in the face as he leaned back against the outer pole. 

fifteen years. 

he's been dead, for fifteen years. has it really been that long? what all has changed? his eyes flickered around the area he was in. taking notice that it seemed to be a small farm. but vacant. no one was anywhere in sight. that made this even more concerning. the silence pierced the air, where loud calls of animals should've been.

xi huang-jun sighed as he continued to wobble on, his mind racing to figure out his situation. why and who had summoned him here was the biggest question. with a heavy sigh, he managed to waddle around to the fence that wrapped around the area. he peered to the side when he heard stomps. and there, a little ways down, was a donkey tied to the fence.

the animal was pounding her hooves against the ground, while attempting to pull free of the rope that kept her there. " ah! easy there donkey! " he called out, pressing his hand against the pole and slowly began his descent to the animal. who had yet to cease her stomping and braying. a sigh passed xi huang-jun's lips as he managed to grab the rope, beginning to work it off the pole.

once untied, he pulled it slightly just in case the donkey tried to escape. " ah! easy! it's alright! " would they understand him? not likely. but it was worth a shot he supposed. fumbling to keep the donkey from running away, as she kept yanking back. frantically looking around for something to use, he took notice of a nearby apple tree. that should work! 

" mn, i don't wanna tie you up again as you might hold it against me! but i can't let you go to get that apple... "

he mainly muttered to himself, but the animal seemed to hear this as well, seemingly understanding what he was attempting to do. but that didn't stop her from trying to pull away. and with a huff, xi huang-jun tried to pull them forwards.

" come on! "

it took a while, both sides struggling, but they managed to get to the apple tree. xi huang-jun paused for a moment, slumping down and huffing out heavily. typical of donkeys he supposed. making sure to keep a grip on the rope, he reached up and snagged an apple from one of the branches. 

xi huang-jun then offered it to the donkey, who happily snatched it from his hand and dropped it to the ground, proceeding to munch on it. and while the donkey ate the apple, xi huang-jun gathered a few more. he knew it would be wise to carry them on him if he would keep this donkey moving. after all, she seemed to have a particular liking towards the said fruit. though, seeing that he didn't have anywhere to stick them, xi huang-jun let them sit on the ground for a few moments. 

" maybe there's a bag inside. "

he hummed in thought, before peering towards the house once again. trusting that the donkey would be too involved in eating her apple to move, xi huang-jun left to the house. he opened the door, quietly stepping inside. and much like the rest of the farm, the area was vacant. but, surprisingly a bag laid on the table. empty, and clearly not in use. no one would miss it, if no one was there to miss it. 

so, he quickly snatched the bag off the table, deciding to grab a few other items from around the house. mainly that of water and food. he then hurried back outside, and much to his relief, the donkey had stayed. happily munching on the apples that were left on the ground by him. a small sigh left his lips as he approached her once again, though plucked a few more apples from the tree and tucked them away. 

" are you ready to leave? "

the donkey snorted, before lifting her head to gaze at him. she then turned her head back down to continue eating the apple, and xi huang-jun took this opportunity to move up onto her back. he then grasped the rope, guessing this could serve as a rein until he could get her a proper one. tugging on the rope, xi huang-jun attempted to pull her attention from the food. 

and after a few minutes, it worked. this lead to him setting out, down the dirt path that was near the home. this likely lead to whatever town this person lived near. maybe this could give some insight into just who this man was as well. hopefully, it did. so, xi huang-jun reminded himself, he had to be ready for anything. 


	3. 2.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> **flashback
> 
> xi huang-jun arrived at the hidden cloud to study. and he meets lan nainzu. this changes everything.

xi huang-jun sighed gently, leaning back against the boat's edge. the water slid past the hull, gently splashing around. xiao guang-he was hidden away somewhere, something about feeling sick. his gaze peered around, searching for their destination. the cloud temples. one of the best places for studying of cultivation. if he remembered correctly, which maybe he did or didn't. but it was said to be founded by the original cultivator.

but, he knew that he wouldn't remember the name. he was never was good with remembering things unless they were drilled into his mind. which was likely what would happen here. the cloud temples were known for being awfully strict, while also producing some of the most talented cultivators to walk the earth. but then again, the male was sure enough that he didn't need to train here.

but that thought was shook from his head when the boat hit land, causing it to wobble slightly. he sighed slightly, peering up towards the man who had been guiding the boat along the waters. he moved to push the yuloh into the ground, the land by the bank rather soft. mud it seemed. xi huang-jun sighed as he pushed himself to stand, patting imaginary dust from his robes.

" oh. are we here? "

a voice peeped up, catching sight of xiao guang-he. xi huang-jun smiled at this, walking over and ruffling his hair slightly. the action was met with resistance, xiao guang-he pushing his hands away while attempting to smooth his robes and hair out. the action earned a grin before a reply was added.

" ah, yes we are. you're feeling better i presume? "

xiao guang-he sighed softly and nodded slightly in reply, pushing two fingers against his temples before peering ahead, where an endless thicket of bushes, trees and more laid.

" yeah. i guess i have water sickness. or maybe it's from nervousness. "

xi huang-jun nodded in understanding to his words. he stepped back to the front of the ship, tugging the boy after him. which, of course, xiao guang-he met with action with confusion and questioning.

" eh? hang on now! "

xiao guang-he tried to break from his grip, but this proved useless as he was dragged off the boat whenever xi huang-jun climbed off. the two nearly falling into the mud that rested along the bank. thankfully, the man who had brought them here was kind enough to grab xiao guang-he's arm before he fell, holding him in place while xi huang-jun wedged himself from the mud.

once out, he moved to grab xiao guang-he, making sure to avoid the mud this time around. and at this, the male gently swatted his friend's arm. this was met with laughter and xi huang-jun attempting to move away once xiao guang-he's feet met with dry land.

" thank you sir! "

xi huang-jun called out before xiao guang-he echoed his words, once he was done with his little hitting fit. it didn't hurt at all honestly, but he knew well enough why the other had acted like so. after all, it was xiao guang-he's job to keep xi huang-jun under control. it was something they had established long ago in their friendship.

" we should probably head up there. i heard that lan quan is a really scary person. so is his disciples. so i think you'd do yourself some good in not annoying them. "

xiao guang-he glanced towards the path that led to the stairs. which led up to the cloud temples. of course, both knew that xi huang-jun wouldn't take his advice. trouble always followed after the male, and most of the time, he was the cause of it. the two could hear the boat pushing away from the bank, meaning the man who had brought them was leaving.

standing at the base of the stairs, they exchanged a quiet glance before going over the instructions given to them by xiao guang-he's mother. _find a decent walking stick, tie a bell to it. cover your eyes with blindfolds, and don't take them off until you arrive at the top. especially, don't take them off if you hear familiar voices. _

the walk felt as if it took ages, though at best, was simply a few hours. it was a somewhat tiring trip, mainly due to walking and all those voices that echoed out through the surrounding forest. but at least that was over with.

" jeez, that was a lot more tiring that anyone's mentioned. "

xi huang-jun grumbled as he moved to untie the blindfold, xiao guang-he following suit while shaking his head.

" it's a simple requirement. nothing to be too upset over. "

xi huang-jun casted the other a gaze, making it look as if he thought he was crazy. how could he call such a tiring walk simple! it was nearly unbelievable to hear, but then again, such a trait always stayed with xiao guang-he. but his attention was quickly turned away when they were approached by another. a young girl, most likely around the age of seventeen. around the two boys age.

" oh? are you two from the blossom pillar? "

the girl questioned, peering between the two. but, just as quickly as she had asked, a familiar face came into view. xiao bolin. xiao guang-he's older brother, who just like them, had been sent here for study.

" you two finally got here! "

xiao bolin chimed happily as he approached them, once again messing up xiao guang-he's hair. the action earned a loud groan from xiao guang-he, as he attempted to pat his hair down back into place. xi huang-jun chuckled as he watched the two, before reaching forwards to hug xiao bolin.

" it's nice too see you again 热头. "

xiao bolin laughed softly, returning the hug. the three seemed quite happy to see one another, and the girl didn't seem to try and interfer. but the group quickly departed at a voice.

" who are they? "

xi huang-jun turned to face the source, about to pop out a reply that at best, would've been sassy or snarky. but his breath caught in his throat when he took notice of the stranger.

" oh, lan xuande. these are the other two from the blossom pillar. "

xiao bolin explained, and xiao guang-he bowed slightly in greeting to the other. xi huang-jun didn't though, his attention glued to the stranger. for some reason, his heart sped faster by the second. and if it weren't for xiao guang-he slightly elbowing his side, he wouldn't have snapped from his daze.

not that he would've minded it. and with a sigh leaving the male, he nodded in understanding.

" bring them along to lan quan then. "

and with that, he disappeared, white robes fluttering behind him. much like xi huang-jun's heart in that moment.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 热头 means hot head.


	4. happy birthday xiao guang-he!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> today is xiao guang-he's birthday, so i wrote a small birthday thing for him!

the statement caught xiao guang-he off guard.

" happy birthday little brother! " 

xiao bolin chirped as he wrapped his arms around the younger, tugging him into a tight hug. 

xiao guang-he yelped softly before laughing lightly, smiling as he tried to return the hug. 

" oh! thank you elder brother! " 

a small laugh left the boy's lips, before yelping slightly as he was picked up off the floor within the bear hug before placed back down. 

" i got you something! "

it was always rare to see his brother seem so happy and relaxed, but xiao guang-he didn't mind it. he actually quite liked it. tugging a box from his robes, he held it out to him. 

giving it a curious glance, xiao guang-he grabbed it from him and tugged the top off. inside was a...collar? 

he shot his brother a confused look as he pulled out the red collar, brows furrowed. now, this didn't make any sense. but the grin on his lips showed that there was something behind this. 

" we all pitched in on this one. " 

xiao bolin pointed out, which only added to his confusion. but then, lan nainzu and xi huang-jun ended. lan nainzu was holding a box, and something was bundled in xi huang-jun's robes. 

" i remember everyday when you were younger, you'd always fuss about wanting a rabbit. " 

xi huang-he hummed softly out softly, shooting a grin between the two brothers while adjusting whatever was in his robes. 

" and you'd always chase them around the temples. "

lan nainzu laughed gently at this, before setting the box down onto the ground. now, xiao guang-he found this awfully odd that they kept bringing this up. 

until it hit him in the face, realization settling. 

" oh...did...did you really? " 

xi huang-jun grinned even more at the surprised look that passed across his expression. and afterwards, he shifted his robes around to produce a rabbit. 

a bit small, but the little ball of fur was enough to earn a squeal from xiao guang-he, who giggled like a child as he was handed the rabbit. 

tucking it against his chest, the rabbit's nose sniffled. pressing itself against the warmth and in curiosity, the rabbit shifted around in his arms before finally relaxing. and a wide eyed, happy xiao guang-he giggled once again as he nuzzled it closer. 

" it's a him. " 

lan nainzu chimed in, which xiao guang-he peered up at the three while nodding in understanding. he grinned happily, hugging it tighter to his chest, though remained careful. 

" 糖果! that's what i'm naming him! " 

he adjusted the rabbit in his arms, and the collar, that bright smile on his face. he was really happy at the moment.

" this is everything you need to help keep 糖果 healthy. we can help you with him as well. " 

lan nainzu hummed softly, and xiao guang-he nodded in understanding. he then shifted the rabbit, pressing a small kiss to the animal's head. 

" i really love him. thank you all! "

the three nodded softly in reply, smiling at how happy xiao guang-he seemed. and really, they could imagine how happy he'd be when he found out about the party. 


	5. 3.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> ** current time
> 
> xi huang-jun arrives in town, and finds an odd item that brings back memories he wished would've stayed away. an old friend's name is mentioned, and he ends up in a rather unsavory situation.

a sigh left his lips as he leaned slightly against the neck of the donkey, shifting the rope around in his hands. he had forgotten just how much time had passed, but now, the sun was high in the sky

" mn, do you think it's afternoon 苹? " 

xi huang-jun questioned as he raised a hand, shielding it from the rays. ah, he had forgotten just how lovely the sun felt. and how it was to feel a breeze. maybe he'd enjoy this more than expected. but, first thing first, he had to figure out why he was here and whose body he was in. 

" say, 苹, do you know whose body this is? was he your original owner? "

only a snort came from the donkey, serving as some unheard response. but then again, the donkey couldn't speak. but maybe she did understand, or at least, that was what he hoped.

" ah, at least you tried to help. "

he responded, giving her neck a pat before perking up at a sound. voices. people? and as he looked ahead, the thicket of trees lessened, opening wider to reveal the entrance to a town. oh, now that helped! 

gently tapping 苹 side, as if to urge her to move faster. which, at first, the donkey only continued at the same pace. but after a few minutes of consistent tapping, her legs began to move faster, a quiet _thump _coming from each step.

soon enough, the two had arrived to the edge of the town. and even from there, xi huang-jun could see that the town was lively. people wandered the streets, and an uproar of noise filled the air. this reminded him a lot of the blossoms pillar.

and for a moment, his body stiffened at the thought. maybe it'd be best not to bring up such thoughts. shaking them away, he peered up towards the sky once again while 苹 continued to venture into the town, her steps slowing once again.

as he made his way closer to the crowds, he earned a few side ways glances, but no one tried and stop him, not even for any type of friendly exchange. maybe the body he had been reincarnated into was simply a loner. maybe that could explain why he lived so far in the forest, and why no one in town seemed to notice him.

that _sucked._ that meant no one could give him any idea to whose body he had ended up in, or what his purpose for being here was! though, he doubted anyone would have information on that latter subject. so, with a sigh, he yanked the rope to stop 苹, which after a few minutes of tugging, she had stopped.

with a small snort, 苹 gently smacked her hooves against the ground while xi huang-jun had slid off. with a sigh, he moved to grab an apple from the pouch and held it out to her.

" quiet down. i'll only be a few minutes. "

she snorted once again, though the sound seemed similar to one of happiness as she bit the apple. causing it to fall from his hand and tumble to the ground. the donkey then bent her head down, munching on the apple whenever she managed to get it into her mouth.

making sure to secure the rope to a nearby post, he moved away. glancing around the area of the town he had found himself in. a few vendors were nearby, and the street was filled with people. most were chatting among themselves, while others were making trade.

with a sigh, he began his descent into the crowd, but never did stop to try for conversation. but, as he walked, his eye caught sight of something that nearly made his heart stop in his chest. a familiar wave of white robes, followed by the tips of a silver headband. 

his footsteps slowed to a stop, eyes widened and watching it, though it disappeared just as quickly as it had appeared. and for a moment, xi huang-jun felt an urge to follow after them, a part of his mind begging to know if any of them had been _him._

but, that thought dissipated, as he reminded himself that even if he was there, xi huang-jun doubted that the other wouldn't want to see him. yet, as voices chattered up around him, a single name made his head whip around in search of whomever had spoke it.

" ...lan xuande. "

of course, he hadn't heard the rest of that conversation, but that name was enough to tell him almost everything he needed. lan xuande. lan nainzu. his mind began to race, and throwing away any sort of sense, his feet led him forwards. slowly, he found the source. two young men, wearing familiar white robes accented with gold and silver. they were walking, while talking softly among themselves.

xi huang-jun tried not to make his presence known, as he followed after them. nothing else they said could be heard. yet, even then, a part of him wondered if lan nainzu was nearby. but, that raised several more questions. mainly towards, if he was really here, why? and even more so, would lan nainzu know who he was? not the body, but the actual him.

ah, no that wouldn't be right. he wouldn't notice him, or know him, especially in this new body. but his mind was snapped from the thoughts as his feet stumbled, an 'ofmp' leaving him as his face met with the ground. well, that was utterly ungraceful. 

" pardon me, are you alright? "

he craned his upwards, peering towards the stranger. his eyes widened as he realized that it had been one of the two who he had been following, quickly pushing himself to stand while shaking his head.

" yeah, yeah i'm fine. " 

he responded a bit too quickly, pushing himself to stand while dusting robes off. that wasn't good, at all. he sighed softly, lips pressed in a thin line. and what came next nearly made him jump out of his skin.

" well, how are you then lei bojian? our last meeting was a bit short. "

_oh no._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 苹 - apple.


End file.
